In sickness and in health

It’s been a good while since I last updated my blog.  Lots of crazy things have been happening, both good and bad.  I’ll kick off with the not so nice:

I’ve been terribly ill of late and unable to apply myself to anything.  I’ve made it along to gigs, and that’s been keeping me going, but the rest of the time I’m a bit of a zombie.  I already suffer from depression and anxiety, brought on by years of alcohol abuse, which is controlled with medication, but I developed a mighty pain in my crown jewels last August.  Thinking the worst I went to get it checked out at my Doctors.  At first the gave me antibiotics for an infection called epididymitis.  That didn’t work and it was getting much worse, so they sent me for an ultra-sound.   I went and got the KY Jelly smeared all over me (very weird sensation!) and it turned out I had varicose veins in my scrotum and that they could explain the pain I was suffering.  It’s also known as varicocele.  The great thing was I didn’t have anything life threatening.  The bad news, it wasn’t considered an emergency so I had to  wait until April to get an operation to fix it.  Also known as a Varicocele embolision.  This is where they  put a big wire in through your groin, travel up your veins to your stomach, then down towards the testicles.  They then place platinum coils in the varicose vein to block it and stop the blood flow causing the swelling.

All was going well until the told me they could only do one side.  This was due to not having the appropriate catheter.  I’m going back in next week where they will go in from the vein in my neck as they will have the equipment then.

I have been on very strong pain killers for quite a while now and, as they do relieve me from being very sore, they make me quite drowsy.  The problem is I can’t do anything while I’m sore.  All I want to do is crash out in my bed.  The other option is to take the pain killers and be a zombie.  Because of this my work-flow has been hit hard, I’ve lost actual work, I’ve had to cancel gigs, and my college work has been effected.

With that pretty much hitting me all the time, I was in the bath a couple of weeks ago and my right ear suddenly went deaf.  Again I went to the Doctors and they are making me wait for 2 weeks until they drain it.  I’ve been given ear drops which I’ve been using.  It’s been very weird and difficult to sing and play gigs, or do menial tasks, with only one working ear.

The whole experience has left my depression levels a bit low as it’s all left me feeling drained.  But I suppose things could be worse.

The good news is I’m still gigging.  My music has been keeping me going.  I was in Germany again in April for the semi-final of the Troubadour competition.  I came second which secured me a place in the final on the 12th of June.  I was put up by Kim Nixon, who was runner up to me in the first round.  I really love Germany and Berlin has so much history and culture.  The German people, are quite  simply, wonderful.

I have also been able to continue with my album, albeit rather slowly.  My college, JEVC, has been refurbished big time and it has had a whopping amount of cash spent on their recording studio.  Apparently its better that the BBC’s studio.  It really was amazing.  I have been allowed to go into the studio so that the students have someone to record with a bit of experience.  I think we will be doing another album in there after the summer.

Back in January I had the great privilege of writing and contributing to an album of original Christian music for Origin Scotland.  I wrote 3 songs for the album and two of my close friends both contributed equally.  The album has band, choir, and orchestral instruments in the tracks.  We spent a week recording on the Isle of Mull at a fantastic Studio run by the Scottish charity An Airde.  It’s been a bit of a struggle for the Sound Engineer Ewan Mcrae but it’s finally done, and we should be getting the finished CD in the next week.  I am really looking forward to it.

Open Doors have also asked if I’d play at the annual Christian festival Frenzy on their stage.  I’ve got the Origin band coming with me to promote and sell some of their CDs.  My good pal Jodi Anne Thomson is coming to sing too and the guys in the band are going to back her songs.  It’s going to be a cracking show.

So all is not lost.  The summer festivals are looming as is the completion of my first album.  I’m really looking forward to getting better, travelling, and writing new material.  Things can always be worse.  I remember where I was  over 3 years ago and realise that I am very lucky to be here.  So I persevere in my struggles and rejoice in my sufferings.  I have a feeling that the horizon yields great tidings.